Sorry for the absence of blogging, but I just didn't know how to write this post. October 14-21 was a sad week for the Hartleys. On October 14th, our suspicions were confirmed that I was no longer pregnant. I know what some of you are thinking..."I didn't even know you were pregnant." That's because I was "only" 7 weeks when I miscarried.
Things were sketchy from the start...at our first (5 week) ultrasound, the doctor told us I was measuring about a week smaller than I suspected. I thought that was strange, but he said it was normal. We went back for the 6-week ultrasound and actually saw a heartbeat (but barely, it was so small). Then things started to change. I started losing my pregnancy symptoms a few days after the ultrasound. I was no longer unbearably nauseated. I tried to tell myself I got lucky this time and that my nausea went away soon (I was sick with Tate for at least 6 months), but as it got less and less, I demanded to go back to the doctor. At 7 weeks, we had another ultrasound that confirmed, even though it had grown just a bit, the baby no longer had a heartbeat. Of course we were heartbroken.
Unfortunately, there are way too many miscarriages in this world. Once you have gone through it, others who have experienced the same thing start to come out of the woodwork. My doctor called it a "club"...one I wish I wasn't a member of. While it is heart wrenching, I know it is part of God's plan. I know it was not because I did anything wrong. And I know God will continue carry us through it. If someone reading this has any questions about it, feel free to contact me. I am an open book and will be glad to share more of my experience. Sometimes when healing, it helps to hear you are not alone.
Seven days later, on October 21, my mom called to tell me that my dear "Granny" (Gracie Pearl Fox Farmer) had passed away. She had been battling Alzheimer's for 7 years and her body had finally given in. When I first heard the news, I had tears of joy because I knew she had a new body and a new mind, and was elated to be in heaven. She was a godly woman, reading her Bible every morning with her cup of coffee. She was a remarkable grandmother (after all, I was the only grandchild she had so I got lots of attention). She made me awesome birthday cakes in whatever shape I wanted. She was also one of the kindest people I know, with a great sense of humor and she will be greatly missed. Below are a couple of pics of Granny. And yes, that is me with the Mickey Mouse cake. :)
